Overcome low self-esteem. Build confidence.

How can you overcome low Self Esteem? There's nothing more explanatory to this than: Self respect

Much like pride, but not really pride, It's certainly not coupled with arrogance if that's what you're thinking
 But rather, it is what seperates you from those who haven't attained Self-acceptance
 You won't give yourself due respect of you don't accept that;
"I am this and that and nothing is going to change that. I just need to improve myself more"
 Look at "being shy" as a sub topic
 I am not a scientist or anything and haven't conducted fieldwork questionnaires to realise that, being shy is an obvious sign of low Self-Esteem (self respect).

 If you are a shy person, It's because you have not realised your strengths, and your weaknesses will be capitalized on by people of higher Self-esteem.

 Look at the school playground,
A Bully might not always be bigger than everyother kid on the playground, but he knows something they don't, he knows what that crybaby does not know. He knows what the insecure child doesn't know,
 He's knows his strengths, which is,
"I am not a crybaby, they are, and always will be"
 This is why he's the bully of the playground, because he knows whenever he pushes the kids around, they'll always shove over.

 My friend, anyone can have high  self-esteem, one does not need to have a big physical appearance before society sees one as a person of high Self-esteem, but that's only when they accept that,

"This is my weakness, and I'll never let anyone use it against me. I'll build more on my strengths."

If you're the shy type, a common trait among the youth society,
Capitalize on your strengths and it shall help you overcome your nervousness.

I myself I'm  still shy of dancing in public, But as far as I'm concerned it's the only thing I am afraid of doing in public, I'm sure if I can only realise that am a greater dancer than the next guy, maybe then I'll be able to overcome my nervousness.

My friend, if only you can look deep inside of yourself and see how great you are in what you do best, maybe you'll stop letting a bully push you over and start doing things yourself.

 Believe it or not, The playground is not the only place that has bullies.
High self Esteem is very much attainable.

Thank you very much for reading

You want a high self esteem? You need to work on self-acceptance

My friend, do you know what Self-acceptance is? If you don't know what self acceptance is you can't understand Self-esteem is because there's more to Self-esteem than what's in a dictionary.

 My father tells me often,
"Never forget who you are, ever"
(albeit said in yoruba).

 As a person with a young and wild mind I used to think this had to do with; don't join bad gangs, keep good company, blah blah blah.

 But I grew older and I realized that the saying had a wider scope attached to it.

 You see, as we change our environments, company, hobbies and many other things that influence our lives, We forget our origins. We forget what we used to be, we try to copy other ppl, we try to copy our friends decisions. We try to see things from another person's perspective.

 This is a double-edged sword, it works for and against us, adopting new lifestyles makes us forget who we are and what we used to be.
 This is bad especially if what we're changing into, is more to our detriment, we copy what we see unconsciously and no matter how much better we are than what we see, We copy it anyway and ignore our potentials and true self.

 We forget what we're capable of in the end,
 This is lack of self-acceptance, What we don't know is if we accept who we really are without allowing full dominance of foreign lifestyle, we will always end up better than the mindless crowd that copys everything they see like a primitive monkey.

 The moment you accept who and what you are, Is the first step to achieving optimum Self-esteem, the moment you know your strengths and capitalize on it, you become better for yourself and everyother you influence.

 Yes, everyone has their weakness, but if you discover this weakness before anyone does, they won't be able to use it against you.
I'll end with this, keep in mind that if you don't accept who you are, no one would give your presence acknowledgement, they'll only see you as just another copycat monkey.

Self-acceptance is just another step to build confidence. 

Self image matters

 I just read the definition of "Self-image"
 The idea one has of one's self about appearance, abilities and personality

According to the definition, the way one sees himself/herself is a great contribution to self Esteem
 Self Esteem to my own understanding is the amount confidence you have to execute actions especially in nervous situations.
It's a real annoyance that we humans can't see ourselves from a third person perspective and it has a telling effect on our psyche.

 "My name is Jacob, I am the best farmer in the village, I have a small farm though but I believe it is the best in the village even though Jack lives next door and has acres of crop land to disqualify my farm's potential, I still believe my farm is better than his."

This👆 is Jacob's self image
 He sees himself better than someone that the whole society deems superior to him, It's not a bad thing! In fact it makes him look at Jack as his equal rather than superior, and boosts his confidence/assertiveness when the both of them are called to defend their handwork.

 Now before I lose your attention, I'd like you to remember a famous quote from the Bible
"As a man Thinketh, so is he" (it had been clichéd... Unfortunately)

Although rich people are confident ( sort of) powerful people are more confident (or arrogant) but it's their thinking that makes them this way! The way they perceive their abilities and appearance. I've seen a beautiful girl that complains to me that she is "fat" even though she isn't, But the fact that she thinks of herself that way, there's nothing anyone else can say to change her mind easily.

Your Self-image can either be positive or negative and I've explained the positive side ( Farmer Jacob) and the negative part (the Beautiful "fat" girl)

Believe me! If you have positive self image, you'll be a step closer to attaining proper self development.
Having a negative one will not only make you see yourself as WEAK, but so will society in every aspect of your life.
I'll end with this
Be proud of who you are! Always think of yourself as "good enough, if not better!" Always

Fashion development

Fashion development
 Let's look at it from fashion today,  Not really fashion... But your dressing! Remember the old saying... "the way you dress is the way you're addressed"? That saying has been used too much, and yet you hardly see anyone making peace with it.

You see, your appearance goes a long way to contributing to your own self-development
Your appearance is decisive whether people will take you seriously or regard you as "just another person"

Your appearance contributes to your confidence!
If you're poorly dressed, you yourself won't feel good about it. when I say dressing, I don't mean buying expensive clothing or footwear.... No,
I simply mean keeping in line with what the correct fashion says.

Imagine a scene where you're in a seminar, and the speaker gets on stage... His hair and facial hair is unkempt, his clothes looks rather rumpled or wrinkled and there's a stain on the lower part of his trousers.... To top it all! He is wearing slippers!
 In your mind you'll be like,
"who is this clown? "
I am even sure you'll pay more attention to his outfit than his..."speech"
Therefore, you're not taking him seriously and he loses your audience.... This indirectly drains  his "feel-good juice" And he loses confidence.

 Your appearance matters, a lot! Moreso if you're in the presence of authority or a formal interview
 Or you're about to approach a girl even!
 Here's a little bit of tips you should take along with you
- buy clothes that fit you,
-make sure your colors match
-dress for the occasion, highly.
- wear good shoes! Even good sandals work!
-Keep your hair well kempt
-you don't have to follow trends, do what makes you happy, but do it correctly
-brush your tongue when  brushing your mouth, don't brush your teeth only! Mouth odour drains self-confidence
-keep good friends that tell you the truth about your appearance! (that's an extra)
 Remember
You don't have to spend a thousand dollars to be taken seriously, a few naira can work wonders if spent wisely.

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Be humble!

 Self development is very important.

 Humans grow everyday but unfortunately some people refuse to grow themselves psychologically
 There's a popular thing people will tell you when you're trying to attempt something alien to you, for example;

Facing a crowd,
Talking to authority
Facing social challenges e.t.c.

Normally when you prove anxious to people's eyes and tell them your insecurities the most clichéd reply you'll get
 "be yourself" or "be who you are and don't fake your behavior" but I find this not good enough especially if you wish to achieve somethings in life.

 Instead of "being yourself...." why not "improve yourself"?
Why not try to improve areas that are underdeveloped and will never help you unless you improve them?
You see, humans shouldn't be themselves when their "self" is below average by societal standards for example in the areas of self-confidence and assertiveness.

One need to improve some of these areas if you wish to be taken seriously by the world
Self development is crucial in your growth as a human being.

Now on to "Humility"
There is little to say on Humility because it's the right thing to be, in opposition to Pride
 Humility, concisely, is the act of being humble, that means the behavior one engages in that doesn't portray one as arrogant and being "full of themselves".

 It has its advantages,

People will respect you,
It brings Respect in regards to your decisions,
You'll discover that it makes you "undefined" when it comes to evaluation
It is a surprise attribute that facinates people to listen to you.
People will listen to your opinions more than an arrogant or pride counterpart,

There are disadvantages of humility as well.

But to me, I feel the biggest one is the problem of being overly underestimated.
 Because people don't, won't, and might not know what you're capable of,therefore they'll underestimate your ability since you're not a bragging person who talks about his achievements like a newscaster

So how can you be humble?

It's easy.... Keep your mouth shut about your achievements. Even when people ask you about it.. Tell your achievements as if it's nothing compared to other great feats (because really, it is nothing!) even the real "great" ppl of our time are mostly humble individuals who don't go about bragging about their business, achievements, experience and so on
If you've done some thing, remember someone else has done a lot more... Then maybe you'll be one step closer to being humble
Because no one relishes the ambiance of proud people. Why not be the opposite?